The awkward dinner in the Hamptons continues as the “Summer House” group is still trying to wrap their heads around Amanda Batula announcing she wants to stay in New Jersey for months at a time.
“I’m just thinking about my future and the kids and like, raising a family,” she says. Lindsay Hubbard is all for it because she wants kids and a family too.
Kyle Cooke is worried because he thinks NYC is the best place to be. “As a man, you just f*cking get over it,” Lindsay tells him. “Once you start having kids, your priorities start changing, though.” Meaning, Kyle can’t go out drinking until 4 am because bars in New Jersey close earlier.
Lindsay asks if he even wants kids and Kyle tells Amanda that he wants them to be able to communicate better first. “Otherwise, I’m going to feel very lonely,” he admits. Amanda rolls her eyes, which is not a good sign. The others sit around the table wishing they could be anywhere else but there while Amanda and Kyle discuss their future.
Amanda tells the cameras that she and Kyle always agreed they’d raise their kids in the ‘burbs. However, he’s going back on his word. “I’m just kind of like, what the f*ck?”
Carl Radke and Lindsay Hubbard talk wedding
Paige DeSorbo deftly changes the conversation and asks Lindsay and Carl about their wedding planning. Kyle tells the group he and Andrea Denver have matching suits for their flower boy role. Jesse Solomon asks, “What’s a flower boy even do?”
Carl confirms that it wasn’t his idea to make Kyle a flower boy in a confessional. “In a perfect world, if the decision was solely based [on] me, yes, Kyle would have been a groomsman.”
Kyle’s had enough of talking about flower boy duties and gets up to talk to a caterer, who just wants to clean up so he can get out of there.
Everyone does a cheers to Paige for dinner even though she didn’t do anything except pay for it. As they all get up, Kyle whispers, “Amanda, please be nice to me.”
Kyle Cooke and Amanda Batula continue to complain about each other
Because the whole house doesn’t know how much Kyle and Amanda despise each other, they go on to b*ch about one another to the other “Summer House” cast.
Lindsay asks Kyle if he’s in the doghouse with Amanda and he tells her, “I’m eating, like, dog treats and stuff. What would scare me to death is if I’m off on an island, AKA, suburbia, and I don’t have someone to talk to. I just feel like that there are times where I’m just like, I can’t f*cking do it all.”
Upstairs, Amanda tells Paige and Ciara Miller, “He’s delusional. He slings mud and then he’s like, ‘Be nice to me.'” She then complains about how Kyle doesn’t want to move to New Jersey for their future children.
In the kitchen, the guys and Danielle Olivera are making tinfoil hats because Craig Conover obviously got through to them about aliens and how they steal your brain thoughts. Kyle tosses a ring at Danielle and she catches it with her hat. They cheer like frat boys.
It’s a totally different vibe upstairs, where Paige, Amanda, and Ciara are using AI to see what their babies would look like. At least Amanda and Kyle have stopped complaining about each other — for now.
Beach volleyball day! Spike!
The next day, the group has a volleyball game planned at the beach. Of course, Amanda says she’s not going to play. Perhaps she does need to check her hemoglobin levels.
The two tall guys, Carl and Jesse Solomon are captains of the teams and both brag about how they were volleyball stars when they were younger. Jesse Solomon even played in the Junior Olympics. The teams are divided into The Surfer Bros (Carl’s team), while Jesse is heading The Lifeguards.
Kyle is in The Lifeguards team and he forgot to bring anything red so Ciara gives him her bathing suit. Thankfully, he puts on swim trunks over it. “My junk is all up in that like a boom-nana.”
At the beach, Lindsay tells Carl she made him a sandwich. “Wow, you must be in love. She made you a sandwich,” Paige says, referring to the time Lindsay asked her ex, “What sandwiches have you made me?”
In a turn of events, one of the guys rips Kyle’s swim trunks off and he lies down so no one sees his junk. Unfortunately, he takes this opportunity to twerk. They all play volleyball, minus Amanda, and The Surfer Bros win after Ciara hits the ball out of bounds. Carl is in all his glory.
Kyle Cooke and Amanda Batula attempt to talk
Kyle grabs Amanda away from everybody so they can talk without boring everyone with their marital problems. He tells her that they weren’t on the same page at dinner the night before.
“You’re on my sh*t list,” she responds. “You were out ’til 4 am, you were pissed that I called you out on it, so you copped this whole attitude and started talking about all the other things that you’re mad about just because I’m mad at you about something legitimate.”
“That’s not how I would sum it up,” he says. Kyle repeats that he just wants to communicate better but Amanda replies that it seems like BS and gets mad.
“Just because I go out ’til 4 in the morning once a month is not a reason to hate me,” he insists. Amanda points out that he’s always going out and drinking with other people.
“I’m a very social person and it is lonely as f*ck being married to you ’cause you don’t talk to me,” he shoots back. Amanda has had it by now and walks away. “I’m so f*cking over this sh*t,” Kyle mutters in his bathing suit.
Lindsay Hubbard puts doubts into Ciara Miller’s mind about West Wilson
Back at the house, Ciara video chats with West Wilson, who is away at a wedding. He shows her that his nose is healing nicely after Kyle pushed him off the tricycle during their race-themed party.
It’s cute that Ciara is missing her new beau and she tells the cameras, “I don’t have chemistry with everyone, I don’t get along with everyone, and when I like someone, I like them. It makes me a little bit nervous in like, it might not be reciprocated in the same way.”
Ciara doesn’t have anything to worry about with West because he tells her that he’ll save watching “The Bachelorette” for the two of them on Tuesday. If that’s not love, what is?
Amanda chugs ranch dressing right from the bottle. “Are you serious right now?” Ciara asks her.
Ciara gets asked about her status with West and she tells Lindsay, Andrea, and Amanda that she’s just trying to play it cool. Then, Lindsay stirs some sh*t when she asks Ciara, “I have a question, though. Like, when he says something, do you take him serious? Like, he’s just like a flirty f*cking guy.”
That was clearly the wrong thing to say because Ciara’s face is like WTF. “I think he acts differently with Ciara than like other people,” Amanda inputs to do damage control but it doesn’t look like it worked.
Paige DeSorbo calls out Kyle Cooke
At the bar, Paige remarks on how everyone has been getting along thus far, especially Kyle and Lindsay. Danielle agrees.
Kyle says, “I’m having a good summer but I want to feel like I’m on the same page as Amanda.” Paige responds, “I know what you should do. Stop being such a f*cking dick to her.”
“I’m not a dick,” he protests. Paige admits that Amanda can be hard on him and Kyle slurs tells her, “I know this is going to sound ridiculous but like, last weekend, I was like, the last one up and like, her phone was on the … on the sink, and I opened it up and there wasn’t a single photo of me.”
“She loves you though, Kyle,” Paige insists. It seems like Kyle doesn’t know that because he starts crying. “It’s okay,” Paige soothes him.
Lindsay Hubbard opens up about her sex life with Carl Radke
The ones who stayed in play Truth or Dare. “How would you honestly rate your sex life with your current partner, scale one to ten,” Andrea reads.
Then, Lindsay drops the ultimate bombshell. “Two and a half.” Everyone is all agog. “You have to have sex. I mean, we had sex today but it was the first time in a couple of weeks,” she tells them. Wait, there’s another bombshell. “No one came,” Lindsay says. Everyone’s mind is blown.
“I’ve always been patient with Carl… I love this man so much and I know that he wants to make me happy but if someone is not ambitious and is matching my drive, that’s a little bit of an issue for me,” Lindsay tells the cameras.
She shares with the group that Carl wants to please her so much that it messes with his head and puts too much pressure on him. It’s TMI but it also shows what’s wrong in their relationship.
Jesse Solomon woos a girl in the hot tub
The rest of the group who went out comes home but Jesse Solomon and Kyle Cooke stay out partying. Jesse comes back with a girl named Camille, whom he takes to the hot tub. “It’s too hot,” she complains. “So are you,” he says. He needs to up his pickup game.
They make out and Jesse Solomon brings Camille to his room, where he covers the camera with a towel and proceeds to get it on.
Kyle comes into his and Amanda’s room all drunk and she’s continuing their fight from before. “I’m so over you. Like, how are you gonna f*cking put up a stink, put up a fight with me, and then again come home at 4 O’clock in the f*cking morning?” Kyle is apparently too drunk to answer.
Andrea is the boyfriend we all need. He brings Paige and Ciara their morning beverages of choice, which he knows to a tee because he’s so attentive and did it for two seasons.
Even if the drink order was wrong, you would drink it and like it, because Andrea took the time to make it and bring it to you fully dressed with his hair done and teeth brushed. Men take note.
Amanda Batula and Kyle Cooke have a therapy session
As if it hasn’t been apparent already, Amanda and Kyle need some help in their marriage so a therapist makes a house call.
“So, we work together. I started a company, and she quit her job to help lead the creative,” Kyle explains. Flashback to him begging Amanda to work for Loverboy. “Ever since then, when we get into it, I will bring up the things that she’s not doing. I’m always wanting more,” Kyle explains.
“It makes me feel like I’m not good enough,” Amanda says. She shares that she often feels that way but when Kyle criticizes her, it just adds to her feeling of self-doubt.
Amanda admits that her insecurities stem from herself and not necessarily from Kyle and the therapist gets Kyle to see that he’s sensitive to Amanda snapping at him. Honestly, she’s uncovered a lot in 10 minutes than Amanda and Kyle have been able to in eight seasons by themselves.
Kyle tells Amanda that he feels like she devalues all the hard work he’s done if he goes out drinking for one night. She shoots back that he should know what triggers her because he went out one night and cheated on her.
“I had an unfaithful moment that kind of just continues to haunt me,” Kyle admits. “It’s not about that he cheated on me so long ago and people talk about it all the time that I’m like so caught up on the cheating … It’s the PTSD from that instant,” Amanda reveals.
Lindsay Hubbard goes dress shopping
It’s the big day — Lindsay tries on wedding dresses. All her friends and bridesmaids join her to drink champs and watch her put on white bridal gowns, including Gabby Prescod, who’s been missing from the past couple of episodes of “Summer House.”
Lindsay already has one contender in mind and it’s too bad she won’t be wearing it because it looks GORG.
Danielle starts tearing up and she and Lindsay hug. “This summer is a complete 180 for us since last summer,” Lindsay tells her. “I’m so happy for you,” Danielle says. We all know how it turns out…
