The “Vanderpump Rules” group has all convened for the reunion, including Brock Davies, who is apparently a cast member now. He’s dressed as a curtain on top and Keebler elf on the bottom.
Andy Cohen says hi to everyone and then jumps right in with the whole Ariana Madix and Tom Sandoval living situation. He asks Ariana about the motion she filed to force Sandoval to sell the house. She says she’s not allowed to talk about the legal matter.
However, at least they’re not officially living together anymore as she reveals she’s staying in an Airbnb while also living in New York.
Andy points out to Sandoval that when Jax Taylor cheated on Brittany Cartwright in 2017, he told him to GTFO of there. Sandoval argues that Jax and Brittany were staying in a 1 bedroom apartment while he and Ariana had a big house.
Andy Cohen addresses the elephant in the room
Even though she’s not on this season, Raquel Rachel Leviss was a hot topic of conversation. Andy asks Sandoval if he expected her to return this year and he says that he encouraged her to take some time away from the group.
He then completely sh*t talks about his former mistress and says, “Looking back, I think she’s a f*cking coward. Like, I’m sorry to say it. And I think her sitting here preaching everybody like she’s moving on but still talking relentlessly about me and everybody is just f*cking ridiculous.”
Sandoval is just salty because he thought he and Rachel would go running off into the LA sunset and never look back. Instead, she said on her podcast that what they had was never real. Curiously, he’s still wearing lightning bolt jewelry, which had signified their undying love for each other.
Andy brings up Rachel’s comment that she was groomed by Sandoval, who takes offense to that because it implies that he’s a pedophile. Lala Kent, who is desperately trying to be in every scene, jumps in and tells him that grooming is influencing someone younger and more impressionable while having more power than them.
“Well guess what. I was very impressionable when she took all her clothes off and jumped in my f*cking pool,” is Sandoval’s response. He needs to know when to keep his mouth closed. Where is his PR person?
Sandoval’s point is that he wasn’t the one actively pursuing Rachel and that she’s responsible for her part in Scandoval.
Tom Sandoval is not the number one smartest guy in the group
Andy pivots the conversation to Sandoval telling Lisa Vanderpump that he was having suicidal thoughts right after Scandoval broke out.
“I have my ups and downs. Anything I say or do is very, very heavily scrutinized, you know. And I’m not perfect and I’m not the smartest dude,” Sandoval admits. Facts.
When asked how she felt after hearing Sandoval was suicidal, Scheana Shay says, “I’ve lost someone to suicide before and I remember the last conversation I had with them and I wasn’t really supportive and it was just kind of like, ‘Well, look at where your choices have put you,’ not knowing they were in that dark of a place.”
Andy asks Ariana how she felt about her ex’s mental state and she answers that it wasn’t her doing so basically, her hands are clean. She then brings up how Sandoval weaponized her mental health after last year’s reunion.
Sandoval has no clue as to how he did so and Scheana answers, “You talked about it publicly, Tom. We had this conversation.” Flashback to him telling Lisa last season that Ariana threatened to kill herself if he left her.
“I brought it up because I felt that it was used against me in a very textbook manipulation tactic. And I hate to say that but when you’re like in a relationship that is not going well, and then you’re like talking about how you want out … ” Sandoval says.
Lisa jumps in and says that’s very different because it was a private conversation between him and Ariana, while he told her about his suicidal thoughts knowing the moment was being taped.
Everyone just wants Sandoval to take accountability for his actions but there’s always a “but” with him. Andy brings up his comparing Scandoval to OJ Simpson and George Floyd in an interview, which got him a lot of heat.
“I’m not defending anything I said. I just was talking about the absurdity that this … scandal got,” he says defensively. “And I just thought of big things in news. Those are the first few big things.”
Scheana Shay’s post-partum OCD made her think Brock was going to cheat on her
Scheana’s daughter Summer Moon is now three years old and she opens up about her post-partum OCD. Andy asks her about her fear that Brock and Lala are going to secretly hook up behind her back.
“Is that brought on by your OCD or is that brought on by what happened with Tom and Rachel?” he asks. “I think that’s what triggered it. Well, if he could do this, could he do this?” Scheana points out.
She also adds that she’s read in social media comments that fans have seen the way Lala looks at Brock and vice versa.
Lala assures Scheana that that will never happen and adds, “Of course, I look at him a certain way. He’s stepped up to the plate when like, when there were no men around to kind of help me navigate. It is like we are a throuple.” Scheana laughs and agrees.
The topic turns to Brock’s relationship with his other kids who live in Australia with his ex. Sadly, they’re not interested in having a relationship with him. He tears up and admits Summer Moon is his second chance at fatherhood. He hopes that his daughter will one day meet her half-siblings.
“I think in our future, we’re going to spend more time down back to Australia and hopefully that can open up that conversation more, you know?” he says.
Lala Kent vs. Katie Maloney
Lala and Katie Maloney discuss their contentious relationship this season. Basically, it’s rooted in Katie’s insecurities about Lala getting closer to Scheana, with whom she’s had a problem since forever.
Lauren from Utah is hurt because Katie supposedly talked about her custody battle with Randall and said that she needs a therapist, not a lawyer.
She seems to forget that that’s not the worst thing Katie has said about her. Remember when she called you a whore for sleeping with a married man?
Time heals all wounds and now another one has opened. Lala is mad that Katie called her a “clown,” which the sandwich shop owner doesn’t remember. Lala brings up girls’ night when they got into it. “You jumped down my throat and I’m like, ‘What the f*ck is this?'”
They start arguing about stuff that no one knows about because it all happened behind the scenes. Apparently, Katie said stuff about Ariana to Lala and it’s all happening now.
“It was that she basically abandoned you in the sandwich shop. This year last time, you said she wasn’t caught up on her rent for the sandwich shop,” Lala claims.
James Kennedy’s face perks up because he’s bored stiff at the lack of drama at this season’s reunion.
Scheana asks Katie if she was salty about Ariana going off to Broadway without telling her. Katie admits she would have liked to have gotten a heads-up from Ariana.
According to Lala, Katie’s reaction to Ariana singing “All That Jazz” for weeks was a blow-out, which she didn’t want to talk about on-camera. Katie allegedly wanted to protect her sandwich shop with Ariana and threatened to destroy Lala’s career, which she supports her daughter on.
How dare anyone retaliate against her! This is where part one of the “Vanderpump Rules” reunion ends and we all go make some Pumptinis. Whew.
